First Ingredient: Personal Warmth

It will probably be a week or so before my Cecil Beaton book arrives. In the meantime, I thought I'd share some more enduring advice from Vogue's Book of Etiquette, 1969. The tips are universal and relate mainly to the concept of home, rather than to decorating. And they apply whether you have endless resources or a tiny budget, so I think the guidance is timely.

Vogue says houses that are well-mannered and harmonious tend to put people at ease and evoke attractive behavior. Four essential ingredients contribute to this type of home: personal warmth, sincerity, understatement, and consideration. "None of these has to do with formality or lack of it. And none is a matter or money."

According to the book, "Personal warmth is the most appealing element in any room and nothing -- elegance, drama, enormous expenditure -- can take its place...it is the sum total of many things, all of which indicate that people really live in a room, and do not merely pass through it."

Vogue stresses the presence of truly meaningful objects over a contrived arrangement. The wildly different homes of Aerin Lauder and artist Konstantin Kakanias contain layers of meaning, and both exude warmth. Kakanias' bohemian digs are in the hills of Hollywood, carved out of part of actress Barbara Stanwyck's former playground. Lauder's inherited weekend home, in contrast, is stately. But each house is filled with mementos, not trendy accessories.

Signs of the artist's fascinating globe-trotting life are clear throughout his home, and Lauder keeps her grandmother's spirit completely alive rather than worry about being hip.

"Warmth is an inviting, disarming quality that must originate in a person's or family's sentiments and way of life." Examples include:

A collection of mediocre drawings by a long-dead relative grouped without apology over a pedigreed antique.

A worn Oriental rug that children and dogs cannot really harm.

Paperbacks on the shelves alongside the better-bound books.

Lamps in the best spot for reading as well as for decoration.

A pile-up of magazines rather than a careful arrangement of this month's issues.

A lovingly arranged vase of inexpensive flowers.

"Warmth can begin with sunny colors or big hospitable sofas and chairs, but in themselves these are not enough. A warm room suggests in all its parts that comfort, affection -- even personal whim -- are more important than effect." It makes people feel contented, "just as they do in the presence of a warm individual, and they tend to be their best selves because of it. "

Images two through seven show Kakanias' home, as seen in House & Garden

Images eight and nine show the Lauder residence, also House & Garden
The exterior of the Lauder home is from Vogue Living